Thursday, 7 November 2013

Puhleeze! Being 'Protective' and Being 'Possessive' are different!

So many men feel they own their women. They tell them what to wear, who to be friends with, spy on them and check their phones.

And strangely a few women even feel flattered by such attention! It provokes me to think, is this love?

Men! There is a big, big difference in between being ‘possessive’ and being ‘protective’. 

Possessiveness stems from distrust and insecurities. And, believe me, it is not desirable at all. Possessiveness signifies that you distrust her. To be possessive is to tether someone, to refuse them freedom because of jealousy or an irrational belief that they are "yours". Possessive is when you want to control her finances and figure her daily movements. Reasons can be many, one of them being insecurity - a fear that your woman will be seduced by another man, or attracted to another man that she sizes up as a "better catch". But, know that it takes a long while to build trust and confidence in a relationship.

On the other hand, ‘protective’ behavior is a sign of caring. It is when a man respects his woman's personal freedom and checks for transport if she is being late to keep her away from harm and degradation and care for her safety. Being protective is allowing the one you love to find themselves within their strengths and abilities, and to nurture them. Protective is when a man loves his woman to look her best and to wear what she feels most expressive in. Protective is when you make sure there is money in your woman's wallet to get through the day. Protective is when you love her.

As the physically stronger of the two, it's instinctual for a man to be protective. As for possessive-only some men are that way. The two should be mutually exclusive!  

So men, keep your male ego aside. Be ‘protective’ of her and for heaven’s sake, trust her!

With that said, there are many, many possessive females too. Jealousy runs as deep with women as it does with men. From having the audacity to open their eyes in the general vicinity of another woman or speaking to another woman or even speaking of another woman or, or, or… Women do get mad at their mates for all this!

Girls, trust him too! It is not necessary to keep your spying antennas on, all the time!

It is sad that many people feel these two things are the same, when in reality protectiveness is based on love and respect, and possessiveness is ultimately a show of LACK of love or respect.


  1. true and practiced by many....
    but still, it's hard for a woman to be less possessive about her man, females are always over possessive instead of protective... as they say... I can share everything but my love :) :)

    1. Pritesh : True that! Women will be women after all :P


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