Sunday, 1 November 2015

Your Partner Is Your Fan For Life!

Yesterday, I heard Bruce Dickinson talk. He said many, many things worth idolizing. He was talking on how we should convert customers to fans on our blogs. 

The way he pointed out the difference between a customer and a fan simply left me amazed. It taught me something that I shall never forget for the rest of my life.

I am 23, I do mistakes. I get restless and take quick decisions. I regret later, at times. But with people like Bruce Dickinson who leave you with beautiful insights about life, there's so much to learn.

I say many a things when I am angry to people I love. But women hardly mean what they say, when they are angry. This will resonate only with the women, I am sure. Men would just find this statement as a clarification and a dumb reason.

He said, "A customer always has the freedom to walk away from your shop. He just glances at your stuff, if he doesn't like it, he walks off. But a fan, is loyal. Fans are committed to you. Just like your life partner. Your life partner is a permanent fan, not a customer."

A take away I got from this quote was, always be grateful to your partner for accepting you and loving you the way they do. Because they commit to you. And commitment, is a scary word. Not all appreciate its beauty.

He added, "You don't immediately divorce your partner after a fight, you try to make it work somehow. Because they are your fans - lifelong fans."

If there's real chemistry between you two, don't give it up for anybody, because awesome things don't happen often in life.

I learned my lesson, because blame it on my young age, I am always looking for instant solutions for problems in my life. And yes, after taking grave, big decisions I land myself in more painful trouble, sometimes. At testing times, we all become rigid and conclude things, leave no scope for discussion or knowing the view of the other person, it possibly could be that there is another aspect of reality, you are unaware of.

Sometimes, we spoil the beautiful kaleidoscope of our own life with our own hands. So, moral of the story, to cut it short, take a stand, live with who you want to be, stay loyal and work for what and who you really want in your life.

Things do reach a crunch point, but life always tests you. And relationships are always put through trials.

But remember, conclusions are for scientists, you and me are regular people. What troubles us today, attracts us tomorrow.

To be honest, there is a coward in each one of us. To lose the people and things we utterly love. Make your relationships matter and do what it takes to keep them intact and beautiful. Always talk and discuss what troubles you, with your partner. When you're not ready to hear them out, that kills half the charm of your relationship.

Take blame for the wrong you did, say sorry, you do not become small. But never let your permanent fan walk away. It will be a serious loss. 

For a few imperfections, do not ever forget the amazing countless things your partner did for you in the past. Remember, when they brought you medicines when you were unwell? They skipped office to visit you? Remember, when they fed you with their own hands? They didn't need to do that, yet they did. Remember all the sweet names they called you? Remember, when they didn't have a look at their wallet and bought you all that you set your eyes on? Remember when you both said that you are the light in each other's dark lives? Whatever happened to that now? 

Oh have you forgotten they got you your favorite sugar-free sweet, because you didn't like too much sugar? Remember when they pulled out a pen and hastily wrote their name on your hand? Remember when they encouraged you to do all that you love and were happy in your achievements? Remember, remember, they agreed to gobble your burnt rotis too? Remember they never lied to you, about even the tiniest of thing? Remember the way they wipe sweat off your face?

Accept it, you get the taste of heaven when with them. You live your fairytale with them. People may come people may go, seasons may come seasons may go but your love for them will never diminish.

Your partner becomes your CNS, your support system. You may become over confident for a while and say, you can do without them, but the fact is you cannot. Only when you are away from them, you realize their importance as tears trickle down your cheeks.

Never take your fan for granted. Your partner may be a person of few words, little gestures, and simple surprises, but that fills your black & white life with colors.

Never ignore the "fan" who always cares about you, nags for your safety. Because one day, you will push them so far away, that it would be difficult to trace them back.

Just like a fan decides whether an artist's work is a hit or a flop, your life long fan decides your mental and physical well-being. Even if you're angry with the person who means the world to you, take a moment, ponder, see past your memories and decide, "Is he/she worth letting go? Can your life ever come back to where it was before them?" You will always get a reply from within you, "Love deserves a second/third..../infinite chance!"

In today's generation too, there are few people who love with all they have. They are left empty, damaged and shallow when a relationship fails. And at times, you feel you can damage your self-respect too in loving a few people, but then you realize if they loved you back, they would never put you in that dilemma. 

When they say, "I'll always be with you, no matter what." Some people really mean those words. Don't let them go! Respect your fan-for-life, dignify them and their rights and never give up if you have found something you never found in anybody else earlier.

A message to self: Learn to control your anger and disgust. That's what careless words do. They make people love you a little less. 

I am always afraid of losing people who love me, because I never had a long list of such people anyway! They say everyone you lose is not a loss, but they never tell you, these are all cooked up words, a particular loss is all lost, because that is all you ever had. One day, you realize you are not a robot to wash all the beautiful memories, pictures and walk past clean. You are marked with a person's love and it gets impossible to move ahead without that person.

I hear so many love stories that die young. Don't let your love die a slow death. Because with it, hope, dreams and all your plans die too. Many a times, when we observe the other person doesn't love us the way we wish, we feel they don't love us at all. Having that one person to love all your life gives a  sense of purpose.

If you fall for every second person, that is not Love. It is love when whatever happens, there is this one person you cannot simply get out of your mind and heart and you then know, you're their fan forever. A partner is a fan, a promise that you'll have a friend forever.

Marriage box is an empty box, love is filled in by the people, the companionship between them. Always cherish the time you spend with your loved ones, you never know which is going to be your last outing or the last lunch. Life is short.

And I don’t even know if these words could ever justify my sincerest gratitude to a few people I truly, truly love. I love you from your head to your toes, to every part of you. I love you for your flaws, your imperfections, and the dreams we have shared and will continue to do so for all my life even if it is, one sided.

The singular purpose of my life is to absorb the riches of your love and give you more love in return. The silent sad poetry that throbs in my chest cannot be uttered in three little words—or 3,000 for that matter. Whenever I try to describe the way I feel for you, every word seems trite and hollow; the whole English language insufficient. In a universe of infinite possibilities, on a planet of seven billion human beings, I want you. And I would give my life for you, whenever you ask for it. I can bleed my heart just to see you smile. I will love you till the end of days.

With my life turning out so unpredictable at every stage, I am just reminded of one song - "Lag ja gale ki phir ye hasin raat ho na ho, shaayad phir is janam mein mulaaqaat ho na ho."

"He is my world,
My world is blessed,
Millions of stars out there,
But I am settling with the sun,
Brightest of them all,
Home is where my fan is,
Or else I'm homeless.

You complete me,
Like a set of puzzle,
Like 2 pieces of lego,
Like a pen and its top,
Like shoe and laces,
Like a child loves his favourite person,
Like a bee loves a flower,
Like a mouse loves cheese,
You unlock a whole new world for me."

P.S: This is in response to Indispire Edition 89.


  1. Beautifully conveyed. Lovely words, Aayesha.
    Sad to have missed the event & such an inspiring talk. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Deep thought and so well said. It uplifts the mind, Aayesha:)

    1. Thank you for being such a loyal reader of my blog, Vishal.
      Your comments do really uplift me :)


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